Interview With Superman

Rob: Hi, tonight I’m here interviewing the man of steel himself, Superman.

Superman: It’s a pleasure to be here Rob.

Rob: Yes, of course it is. Now let’s get the pleasantries out of the way. How long you been a superhero?

Superman: Well I was born with super powers so I guess since I was born. However, I never really used my powers for good until I became a teenager.

Rob: I hear that you have a funny story to tell us about the different ways you used your power.

Superman: *laughs nervously* Yeah, I guess it’s somewhat funny. The story starts when I was 12; I had just started puberty and had gotten interested in girls. I think I should just say X-ray vision and leave it at that *laughs nervously*.

Rob: So at what point did you decide to wear tights?

Superman: Well… they’re not exactly tights. It’s more like a wetsuit.

Rob: But it’s made of spandex isn’t it?

Superman: Yeah, I guess-

Rob: So they are tights.

Superman: *turns red* What are you trying to imply?

Rob: Nothing… nothing, just asking.

Superman: Well, ask something else.

Rob: Ok, ok. I have a good question that will test the limits of your excuses. You disguise yourself
as a mild-mannered journalist. Is that not correct?

Superman: That’s true. Every superhero needs a disguise. Is there a point to this?

Rob: Yes there is. What kind of simpleton would be fooled by the glasses? I mean, you’ve saved
Louise Lane countless times and you work with her everyday. What part of the disguise
couldn’t she see through? Didn’t the same haircut give it away? What about the same voice
or build? Only some kind of idio-

Superman: OK, I’m going to have to stop you there. I’m in love with Louise and I won’t let you
badmouth her! *stands up*

Rob: *grabs superman’s hand* I’m sorry, I was a little carried away there. I’ll behave myself.

Superman: Sorry, I don’t like where any of this interview is going. I’m leaving. *flies out through
the window*

Rob: *starts to pack up* Man, not exactly mild-mannered is he? Stupid poonce, prancing around
in tights, and what a lame disguise.

Superman *shouts from outside* I do have super hearing you know! And you really shouldn’t be
wearing women’s underwear!